Some new pictures from 2010

My sweet sister in HaMashiach and me. Todah for being my best friend.

Picture taken by HananiYah.

An angel in disguise. *Smile*

My trip to CA with YKA.

My bestestest friend and me at the river.

My handsome prince charming with Momma.

HananiYah now has her permit. Yep....much riding for me insteading of driving. Now can relax and safely text to ya, YKA. hee hee.

My humerous JedidiYah playing around at the Dollar Tree. Too funny ya are...

HananiYah is cold while Daddy and JedidiYah are fishing.

My angel, JedidiYah.

This is me and the picture was taken by my HananiYah. Good job HananiYah. Ya well on your way to becoming a photographer.

My own self portrait. hee hee.

My dearest sweetest hubby in the universe cuddling with me on the couch.

My awesome hubby blowing the shofar to welcome in Sabbath.

This is my beautiful sis in HaMashiach and bestestestest friend in the universe!!!!! Sweet YKA!

This is my beautiful and very bright daughter, HananiYah.

I Met God in the Morning

~~~~

by Ralph Cushman

~~~~

I met God in the morning

When the day was at its best,

And His presence came like glory

Of the sunrise in my breast.

~

All day long the Presence lingered,

All day long He stayed with me,

And we sailed in perfect calmness

O'er a very troubled sea.

~

Other ships were blown and battered,

Other ships were sore distressed,

But the winds that seemed to drive them,

Brought to us a peace and rest.

~

Then I thought of other mornings,

With a keen remorse of mind,

When I took, had loosed the moorings

With the Presence left behind.

~

And I think I know the secret,

Learned from many a troubled way:

You must seek God in the morning

If you want Him through the day.

~

(Taken from The Home by John R. Rice - Page 250)

George Washington's Rules of Civility

In the late nineteenth century, a school notebook entitled "Forms of Writing" was discovered at Mount Vernon, Virginia, George Washington's plantation home on the Potomac River. The notebook apparently dates from about 1745, when George was fourteen years old and attending school in Fredericksburg, Virginia. Inside, in George's own handwriting, we find the foundation of a solid character education for an eighteenth-century youth: some 110 "Rules of Civility in Conversation Amongst Men." Historical research has shown that young George probably copied them from a 1664 English translation of an even older French work. Most of the rules are still delightfully applicable as a modern code of personal conduct. On the assumption that what was good enough for the first president of the United States is good enough for the rest of us, here are fifty-four of George Washington's "Rules of Civility."

1. Every action in company ought to be with some sign of respect to those present.

2. In the presence of others sing not to yourself with a humming voice, nor drum with your fingers or feet.

3. Speak not when others speak, sit not when others stand, and walk not when others stop.

4. Turn not your back to others, especially in speaking; jog not the table or desk on which another reads or writes; lean not on anyone.

5. Be no flatterer, neither play with anyone that delights not to be played with.

6. Read no letters, books, or papers in company; but when there is a necessity for doing it, you must ask leave. Come not near the books or writings of anyone so as to read them unasked; also look not nigh when another is writing a letter.

7. Let your countenance be pleasant, but in serious matters somewhat grave.

8. Show not yourself glad at the misfortune of another, though he were your enemy.

9. They that are in dignity or office have in all places precedency, but whilst they are young, they ought to respect those that are their equals in birth or other qualities, though they have no public charge.

10. It is good manners to prefer them to whom we speak before ourselves, especially if they be above us, with whom in no sort we ought to begin.

11. Let your discourse with men of business be short and comprehensive.

12. In visiting the sick do not presently play the physician if you be not knowing therein.

13. In writing or speaking give to every person his due title according to his degree and the custom of the place.

14. Strive not with your superiors in argument, but always submit your judgment to others with modesty.

15. Undertake not to teach your equal in the art he himself professes; it savors of arrogancy.

16. When a man does all he can, though it succeeds not well, blame not him that did it.

17. Being to advise or reprehend anyone, consider whether it ought to be in public or in private, presently or at some other time, also in what terms to do it; and in reproving show no signs of choler, but do it with sweetness and mildness.

18. Mock not nor jest at anything of importance; break no jests that are sharp or biting; and if you deliver anything witty or pleasant, abstain from laughing thereat yourself.

19. Wherein you reprove another be unblamable yourself, for example is more prevalent than precept.

20. Use no reproachful language against anyone, neither curses nor revilings.

21. Be not hasty to believe flying reports to the disparagement of anyone.

22. In your apparel be modest, and endeavor to accommodate nature rather than procure admiration. Keep to the fashion of your equals, such as are civil and orderly with respect to time and place.

23. Play not the peacock, looking everywhere about you to see if you be well decked, if your shoes fit well, if your stockings set neatly and clothes handsomely.

24. Associate yourself with men of good quality if you esteem your own reputation, for it is better to be alone than in bad company.

25. Let your conversation be without malice or envy, for it is a sign of tractable and commendable nature; and in all causes of passion admit reason to govern.

26. Be not immodest in urging your friend to discover a secret.

27. Utter not base and frivolous things amongst grown and learned men, nor very difficult questions or subjects amongst the ignorant, nor things hard to be believed.

28. Speak not of doleful things in time of mirth nor at the table; speak not of melancholy things, as death and wounds; and if others mention them, change, if you can, the discourse. Tell not your dreams but to your intimate friends.

29. Break not a jest when none take pleasure in mirth. Laugh not aloud, nor at all without occasion. Deride no man's misfortunes, though there seem to be some cause.

30. Speak not injurious words, neither in jest or earnest. Scoff at none, although they give occasion.

31. Be not forward, but friendly and courteous, the first to salute, hear and answer, and be not pensive when it is time to converse.

32. Detract not from others, but neither be excessive in commending.

33. Go not thither where you know not whether you shall be welcome or not. Give not advice without being asked; and when desired, do it briefly.

34. If two contend together, take not the part of either unconstrained, and be not obstinate in your opinion; in things indifferent be of the major side.

35. Reprehend not the imperfection of others, for that belongs to parents, masters, and superiors.

36. Gaze not on the marks or blemishes of others, and ask not how they came. What you may speak in secret to your friend deliver not before others.

37. Speak not in an unknown tongue in company, but in your own language; and that as those of quality do, and not as the vulgar. Sublime matters treat seriously.

38. Think before you speak; pronounce not imperfectly, nor bring out your words too hastily, but orderly and distinctly.

39. When another speaks, be attentive yourself, and disturb not the audience. If any hesitate in his words, help him not, nor prompt him without being desired; interrupt him not, nor answer him till his speech be ended.

40. Treat with men at fit times about business, and whisper not in the company of others.

41. Make no comparisons; and if any of the company be commended for any brave act of virtue, commend not another for the same.

42. Be not apt to relate news if you know not the truth thereof. In discoursing of things you have heard, name not your author always. A secret discover not.

43. Be not curious to know the affairs of others, neither approach to those that speak in private.

44. Undertake not what you cannot perform; but be careful to keep your promise.

45. When you deliver a matter, do it without passion and indiscretion, however mean the person may be you do it to.

46. When your superiors talk to anybody, hear them; neither speak or laugh.

47. In disputes be not so desirous to overcome as not to give liberty to each one to deliver his opinion, and submit to the judgment of the major part, especially if they are judges of the dispute.

48. Be not tedious in discourse, make not many digressions, nor repeat often the same matter of discourse.

49. Speak no evil of the absent, for it is unjust.

50. Be not angry at table, whatever happens; and if you have reason to be so show it not; put on a cheerful countenance, especially if there be strangers, for good humor makes one dish a feast.

51. Set not yourself at the upper end of the table; but if it be your due, or the master of the house will have it so, contend not, lest you should trouble the company.

52. When you speak of God or his attributes, let it be seriously, in reverence and honor, and obey your natural parents.

53. Let your recreations be manful, not sinful.

54. Labor to keep alive in your breast that little spark of celestial fire called conscience.

Blessings,
Amanda

from achristianhome.org

God as Masculine

1. God reveals Himself as masculine, not feminine. God is the eternal Father and the eternal Son, the Holy Spirit is also addressed as “He,” and Jesus Christ is a male. (Matt. 1:25; 28:19; Jn. 5:19; 16:13)

The Image of God and Gender Roles

2. Both man and woman are made in God’s image (their human characteristics enable them to reflect His character) and they are both called to exercise dominion over the earth. They share an equal worth as persons before God in creation and redemption. The man is also the image and glory of God in terms of authority, while the woman is the glory of man. (Gen. 1:27-28; 1 Cor. 11:3,7; Eph. 5:28; 1 Pet. 3:7)

3. God ordained distinct gender roles for man and woman as part of the created order. Adam’s headship over Eve was established at the beginning, before sin entered the world. (Gen. 2:18ff.; 3:9; 1 Cor. 11:3,7; 1 Tim. 2:12-13)

4. Although sin has distorted their relationship, God’s order of authority for husbands and wives has not changed, and redemption enables them to make substantial progress in achieving God’s ideal for their relationship. (Gen. 3:16; Eph. 5:22ff.)

The Authority of Fathers

5. A husband and father is the head of his household, a family leader, provider, and protector, with the authority and mandate to direct his household in paths of obedience to God. (Gen. 18:19; Eph. 6:4)

6. A man’s authority in the home should be exercised with gentleness, grace, and love as a servant-leader, following the example of Jesus Christ. Leadership is a stewardship from God. (Ps. 103:13; Mal. 3:17; Matt. 11:29-30; Col. 3:21; 1 Pet. 3:7)

7. The authority of fathers is limited by the law of God and the lawful authority of church and state. Christian fathers cannot escape the jurisdiction of church and state and must be subject to both. (Rom. 13:1ff.; Eph. 5:21; 6:4; Heb. 13:17; 1 Pet. 2:13ff.)

Family, Church, and State

8. Family, church, and state are parallel institutions, each with real but limited authority in its ordained sphere. As the keeper of the keys of Christ’s kingdom, the church is the central and defining institution of history. As the primary social group, the family is the foundational institution of society. (Matt. 16:19; 18:18; Acts 4:19; 5:29; 25:11; Heb. 13:17; 1 Pet. 2:13ff.; Eph. 1:22-23; 1 Tim. 3:15)

9. Every Christian father and family ought to be a submitted and committed part of a local church, subject to the authority and discipline of the church through its elders. (Heb. 10:24-25; 13:17)

10. The church is defined by its orthodox confession and faithful teaching of God’s word; by the presence of the Holy Spirit; by the rule of qualified elders; by the biblical administration of the sacraments of baptism and the Lord’s Supper; by regular meetings for worship, instruction, breaking bread, and fellowship; and by the exercise of discipleship and discipline. (Gal. 1:8; 1 Tim. 3:15; 1 Cor. 12:13; 1 Tim. 3:1ff.; Matt. 28:19; 1 Cor. 11:20ff.; Acts 20:7; 1 Cor. 5)

11. Male leadership in the home carries over into the church: only men are permitted to hold the ruling office in the church. A God-honoring society will likewise prefer male leadership in civil and other spheres as an application of and support for God’s order in the formative institutions of family and church.(1 Tim. 3:5)

Men & Women: Spheres of Dominion

12. While men are called to public spheres of dominion beyond the home, their dominion begins within the home, and a man’s qualification to lead and ability to lead well in the public square is based upon his prior success in ruling his household. (Mal. 4:6; Eph. 6:4; 1 Tim. 3:5)

13. Since the woman was created as a helper to her husband, the bearer of children, and a “keeper at home,” the God-ordained and proper sphere of dominion for a wife is the household and that which is connected with the home, although her domestic calling, as a representative of and helper to her husband, may well involve activity in the marketplace and larger community. (Gen. 2:18ff.; Prov. 31:10-31; Tit. 2:4-5)

14. While unmarried women may have more flexibility in applying the principle that women were created for a domestic calling, it is not the ordinary and fitting role of women to work alongside men as their functional equals in public spheres of dominion (industry, commerce, civil government, the military, etc.). The exceptional circumstance (singleness) ought not redefine the ordinary, God-ordained social roles of men and women as created. (Gen. 2:18ff.; Josh. 1:14; Jdg. 4; Acts 16:14)

Procreation

15. God’s command to “be fruitful and multiply” still applies to married couples, and He “seeks godly offspring.” He is sovereign over the opening and closing of the womb. Children are a gift of God and it is a blessing to have many of them, if He so ordains. Christian parents are bound to look to Scripture as their authoritative guide concerning issues of procreation. They should welcome with thanksgiving the children God gives them. The failure of believers to reject the anti-life mindset of the age has resulted in the murder of possibly millions of unborn babies through the use of abortifacient birth control. (Gen. 1:28; 9:1; 29:31; 30:22; Ex. 20:13: 21:22-25; Ps. 127:3; 128:3-4; Is. 8:18; Mal. 2:15)

Education & training of children

16. Education is not a neutral enterprise. Christian parents must provide their children with a thoroughly Christian education, one that teaches the Bible and a biblical view of God and the world. Christians should not send their children to public schools since education is not a God-ordained function of civil government and since these schools are sub-Christian at best and anti-Christian at worst. (Deut. 4:9; 6:6-9; Rom. 13:3-5; Eph. 6:4; 2 Tim. 3:15)

17. Fathers are sovereign over the training of their children and, with their wives, are the children’s chief teachers. Christian parents are bound to obey the command personally to walk beside and train their children. Any approach to Christian education ought to recognize and facilitate the role of fathers and mothers as the primary teachers of their children. (Deut. 4:9; 6:6ff.; Ps. 78:3-8; Prov. 1:8; Eph. 6:4; )

18. Educational methodology is not neutral. The Christian should build his educational methodology from the word of God and reject methodologies derived from humanism, evolutionism, and other unbiblical systems of thought. Biblical education is discipleship, a process designed to reach the heart. The aim is a transformed person who exhibits godly character and a trained mind, both of which arise from faith. The parents are crucial and ordinarily irreplaceable in this heart-level, relational process. (Deut. 6:5-7; Lk. 6:40; 1 Thess. 2:7-12; 2 Tim. 1:5; 2 Pet. 1:5-8)

19. Since the educational mandate belongs to parents and they are commanded personally to walk beside and train their children, they ought not to transfer responsibility for the educational process to others. However, they have the liberty to delegate components of that process. While they should exercise great caution and reserve in doing this, and the more so the less mature the child, it is prudent to take advantage of the diversity of gifts within the body of Christ and enjoy the help and support that comes with being part of a larger community with a common purpose. (1 Cor. 12:14ff.; Gal. 4:1,2; 6:2; Eph. 4:16)

20. The age-integrated communities of family and church are the God-ordained institutions for training and socialization and as such provide the preferred pattern for social life and educational endeavors. The modern preference for grouping children exclusively with their age mates for educational and social purposes is contrary to scriptural wisdom and example. (Deut. 29:10-11; 2 Chron. 20:13; Prov. 22:15 with 13:20; Joel 2:16; 1 Cor. 15:33)

21. The Bible presents a long-term, multi-generational vision of the progress of God’s kingdom in the world. Christians parents need to adopt this perspective and be motivated by the generational promises of Scripture, and church shepherds need to promote this outlook within their flocks. By the grace of God, as fathers faithfully turn their hearts toward their sons and daughters and the youths respond in kind, the next generation will build upon the faith and improve upon the faithfulness of their parents. (Ps. 78:1-8; Is. 59:21; Mal. 4:6; Lk. 1:17; Gal. 6:9)

A father and his older children

22. Both sons and daughters are under the command of their fathers as long as they are under his roof or otherwise the recipients of his provision and protection. Fathers release sons from their jurisdiction to undertake a vocation, prepare a home, and take a wife. Until she is given in marriage, a daughter continues under her father’s authority and protection. Even after leaving their father’s house, children should honor their parents by seeking their counsel and blessing throughout their lives. (Gen. 28:1-2; Num. 30:3ff.; Deut. 22:21; Gal. 4:1,2; Eph. 6:2-3)

23. Fathers should oversee the process of a son or daughter seeking a spouse. While a father may find a wife for his son, sons are free to take initiative to seek and “take a wife.” A wise son will desire his parents’ involvement, counsel, and blessing in that process. Since daughters are “given in marriage” by their fathers, an obedient daughter will desire her father to guide the process of finding a husband, although the final approval of a husband belongs to her. (Gen. 24:1ff.; 25:20; 28:2; Ex. 2:21; Josh. 15:17; Jdg. 12:9; 1 Sam. 18:27; Jer. 29:6; 1 Cor. 7:38; Gen. 24:58)

The sufficiency & application of Scripture

24. Scripture is the believer’s sufficient guide for all of faith and practice, and Christians must believe and obey whatever it teaches and commands. The Bible provides the Christian — through precept, pattern and principle — all that is necessary to make wise decisions concerning the many ethically complex issues of life. (2 Tim. 3:16-17; 2 Pet. 1:3)

25. Fathers need to exercise discernment in the choices they make for their families and not simply drift with the cultural tide. Egalitarian feminism is an enemy of God and of biblical truth, but the need for care goes beyond this threat. The values of modern society are often at odds with those that accompany a biblical worldview. For example, fathers need self-consciously to resist the values of individualism at the expense of community, efficiency at the expense of relationships, and material well-being at the expense of spiritual progress. The world and the worldly church will cheer many choices that are detrimental to family sanctification. (Rom. 12:2; 1 Jn. 2:15)

26. While God’s truth is unchanging, the specific application of that truth may vary depending on facts and circumstances unique to each believer. Also, those who are further along in sanctification will see some issues more clearly than those who are less mature. For these reasons great charity must be maintained between believers who have differences of application, and liberty of application must be respected. However, an appeal to the doctrine of Christian liberty must never be used in an effort simply to avoid submitting to what Scripture plainly teaches. Believers should also bear in mind that things which are lawful may not be expedient if the goal is personal and family holiness. The biblical rule in judging behavior is charity toward others, strictness toward oneself. (Gal. 5:2-3 with Acts 16:3; Phil. 3:15; Rom. 12:10; 1 Cor. 1:10; 6:12; 9:27; 10:23; Gal. 5:13)

http://www.visionforumministries.org/home/about/biblical_patriarchy.aspx

Called to the Home - Called to Rule

by Melissa Keen, June 16, 2004

The propriety of Christian, Bible-believing women having careers is a controversial subject in the modern church. However, I believe that God has something to say about everything, even if it is simply a subtly stated principle instead of a direct command or explicit explanation. When tackling any subject, it is vital to use Scripture as the basis for all points of discussion. Following are my personal thoughts and beliefs on the subject and the interpretation of this matter that God has laid on my heart.

~

In Proverbs 9 Wisdom is personified as a woman who is skillful, industrious, and resourceful. Amazingly enough, she accomplishes all her tasks from her home — “Wisdom hath builded her house... whoso is simple, let him turn in hither” (Proverbs 9:1, 4). She has built her house, decorated it, and furnished it. She has prepared food for her guests, using what she has at her home. Not only is her home fully functioning and productive, but she is also able to invite strangers in to enjoy and benefit from her well ordered, exemplary home.

~

As Christian women, we have the responsibility to look not only to our God-given realm of the home, but also to expand our ministry to those outside of our home. There are so many possibilities with the skills we are given! First, we are to use them to benefit our family and home. This is where our priorities and loyalties should always lie. Second, we are to extend the boundaries of our home to include others in ministry and hospitality. “Come, eat of my bread, and drink of the wine which I have mingled,” cries this wise woman (verse 5). I will share more on ministry opportunities in just a bit.

~

In contrast, the author gives a very different word picture of the foolish woman: “She is loud and stubborn; her feet abide not in her house: Now is she without, now in the streets...” (Proverbs 7:11-12). This description appears just two chapters before the chapter describing the wise woman. In Proverbs 9:13, the author continues to contrast these women by saying, “A foolish woman is clamorous: she is simple, and knoweth nothing.”

~

Further, in this same book of the Bible, the author introduces us to the famous Virtuous Woman of Proverbs 31. The list of her accomplishments, activities, and industriousness is quite daunting. Yet again, we see a picture of the well-balanced woman rolling up her sleeves and working — from home. “She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant” (Proverbs 31:24). Not only does she produce high quality goods, but these goods are of a standard of excellence that is acceptable to the merchants.

~

Whatever a merchant sells in his booth is a reflection of his own standard of quality. In order to maintain a good name and stay on the cutting edge of profitable business, a merchant is careful to ensure that all goods stocked in his booth are a good reflection upon his business. In her spare time, the virtuous keeper-at-home creates goods that meet demanding quality specifications and brings in a little profit as well.

~

Lest my views on this subject seem more than a little far-fetched or confined to only one book of the Bible, let us compare these passages with others in Scripture. Titus 2 gives a listing of the desired — nay, required — qualities that a woman of God should exemplify: “That they [the older women] may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed” (Titus 2:4, 5). The older women have the experience and capability in these qualities, and this qualifies them to teach others.

~

Looking again at the passage above, let me draw your attention to the phrase “that the word of God be not blasphemed.” This is the chief point and objective of the list of qualifications of a godly young woman. I believe Paul is saying that disregarding this exhortation blasphemes the name of God — strong medicine for many, I know. We do not like to think that anything we do could defame God’s Word, but I believe Paul wanted us to think soberly about the great power and privilege women have to live the Word before the world — and to see that we can also blaspheme the Word through disobedience to His commands for women.

~

Why do we have such a hard time accepting the timeless truth that we as women can indeed find fulfillment in being keepers-at-home? In I Peter 3, Paul decidedly states, “Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands... for after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands” (I Peter 3:1, 5). In my understanding, this leaves no room for a wife to be in subjection or submission to a man other than her husband, such as a boss at work. Jesus Himself taught “No man can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other” (Matthew 6:24). I understand that the context here is money, but Christ’s teaching certainly fits with the rest of the Scriptural passages studied so far. Therefore, serving another master or submitting to some man other than your own husband is striving to serve two masters. Christ has said that this is impossible. “For either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other.” “Hate” and “despise” are very strong words, are they not? A woman working outside the home under another “master” is in danger of growing in her heart discontentment, hate, and a feeling of despising who God has created her to be and those whom He has called her to serve.

~

Yes, young wives and mothers are the specified recipients of this training, but unmarried women can also benefit from the same training and application of these Scriptural truths. This powerfully enables them to be prepared for whatever God has for them, both now and in the future. A young woman who practices “serving two masters”—her father and employer—while she is single will have perfected this for her married life. This development of an independent spirit could result in a miserable marriage for herself, her husband, and her family. As with any art, the best way to master the art of contented submission is to practice it! Who could be a better recipient of this practice than a young lady’s father? Ideally, a daughter’s relationship with her father will be a vivid picture of what her future relationship will be with her husband.

~

Granted, there are certainly times for ministry or a moneymaking industry—from the home. We obviously see the ministry impact of Wisdom personified in Proverbs 7, and of the Proverbs 31 woman it is said, “She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy” (Proverbs 31:20). Tabitha, also known as Dorcas, is a familiar example of the impact a godly woman can have while ministering to others: “Now there was at Joppa a certain disciple named Tabitha, which by interpretation is called Dorcas: this woman was full of good works and almsdeeds which she did... and all the widows stood by him [Peter] weeping, and shewing the coats and garments which Dorcas made, while she was with them” (Acts 9:36, 39). This woman was dearly beloved in her community. She gave of her self, her time, and her skills to minister to those around her. Where was she while she did this? I believe Paul tells us in the phrase “while she was with them.” This refers to the widows who are mourning Tabitha’s death. Judging from what I understand this passage to say, she stayed in the homes of widows and ministered to them with her skills as a capable, joyful, contented keeper-at-home.

~

My belief is that God did not intend for His women to pursue careers outside the home. The curse that he put upon Adam — the first curse issued in the world — was that he would have a sorrowful, difficult time laboring for his provision: “And unto Adam he said, ... cursed is the ground for thy sake; in sorrow shalt thou eat of it all the days of thy life; thorns also and thistles shall it bring forth to thee; and thou shalt eat the herb of the field; in the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto the ground.” As for Eve, “Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee” (Genesis 3:16-19). The woman who labors to provide for her family while trying to maintain her role as wife and mother voluntarily takes upon herself both the curse of the man and the curse of the woman. The curse of laboring for provision was the curse that God saw fit to place upon the man—not upon the woman. Unfortunately, because of our disobedience in the Church, there are now many women who are forced to suffer under Adam’s curse — women for whom families and churches should be providing (widows, abandoned wives, etc.). This disobedience is expanded when the women laboring outside of the home are not widows or abandoned women, but wives and mothers in an average Christian home. How can either of these situations do anything but blaspheme the Word of God (which calls Christians to provide for widows and orphans and calls men to provide for and protect women and children)?

~

As a well-organized keeper-at-home, the godly wife is not only fulfilling the role God has created her to fulfill, but is now further available to assist her husband in his role. “The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life... Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land... Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her. Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all. Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised. Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.” (Proverbs 31: 11-12, 23, 28-31) Her husband trusts in her implicitly. He knows that her greatest goal in life is to joyfully and lovingly support him in his duties and care for his household. He is confident in her abilities and knows her heart attitude. This allows him to throw his energies into providing for his family. Then, after a tiring day “in the gates,” he cannot wait to return home and enter his haven of rest that his wife has prepared and maintained for him. Notice here where her praises are sung: “Let her own works praise her in the gates.” Could these be the same gates where her husband is known? Therefore, by singing the praises of his supportive wife, her husband is making her known through his influence. What better honor than to be known and praised to the elders of the land? The delight and contentedness of both the husband and the wife in their respective roles in accomplished simply through the tender submission of the keeper-at-home.

~

In summary, I do not see how a career outside the home in any way honors or obeys God’s design for who we are as women. If we truly believe that He is our Divine Creator, that He has known us since the beginning of time, and that He is the omniscient, watchful, tenderly caring God we know Him to be, then our actions will reflect this. If we trust Him and respect His leading and protection in our lives, we will desire to be exactly what He desires us to be. Let us bring glory to Him in the only way He has created us to do so—by being creative, industrious, joyful, contented keepers-at-home.

The Princess by the Fire by Jessie Wilcox Smith

www.visionforumministries.org

Dad's Most Important Ministry

Here are some statistics we received on Father's day from the church we attended then. However, I am not sure of the original source.

Dad's Most Important Ministry

Here are some interesting statistics.

1.) If your parents worshiped with you regularly while you were growing up, chances are 80% that you will worship God regularly too.

2.) If only your mother worshiped regularly with you, chances are only 30% that you will worship regularly.

3.) Now, here's the catch: If only your father worshiped regularly with you, chances are still 70% that you will worship regularly as an adult.

Interpretation - Fathers have a great impact on their children's faith and values. That's pretty obvious. But there may be a more important conclusion: If only Mom is nurturing the kids' faith, then it is easy - especially for boys - to conclude that faith is a female thing, and if that's the case, it is easier for children to dump it as they get older. If Dad stays home on Sunday, the message is clear: Faith is not important to Dad and if it's not important to Dad, it need not be important to the kids.

But, isn't that a sexist interpretation of faith? What difference does it make if faith is important to Mom but not to Dad? We know that according to the Bible, the ideal is that "in Christ there is no male or female." But we don't live in an ideal world; the kingdom of God is not here in its fullness. Our world is still sexist, and on the results of that sexism is the kids will place more value of Christian faith if they see that it is important to Dad, as well as to Mom. What's Dad's most important ministry?

Worship regularly.

Motherhood and Loverhood

Motherhood and Loverhood

A happy love life is good for your children.

~

I believe there is no conflict of interest between motherhood and loverhood. In fact, the bond that is created by sexual intimacy between you and your husband does far more than enhance your relationship alone—it also enriches the lives of your children. That's right! The best mothers are not those women who devote every waking moment to their children. The best mothers are, indeed, those women who take the time—make the time—to cultivate, protect, and express the lover within. Here's why:

~

A happy love life is one of the best defenses against affairs and possibly even divorce. If you ever fall into the trap of thinking that making time for marital romance might detract in some way from the lives of your children, stop a moment and think about how much more they would be affected if either you or your husband had an affair or filed for divorce. Frequent sex does not, of course, guarantee a happy home. And yet a loving and intimate physical and emotional bond between husband and wife is undeniably a welcome harbor in the frequently turbulent seas of marriage.

~

A happy love life established harmony in the home. One woman I interviewed explained it like this: "When sex loses priority and falls to the bottom of the list, there's a brokenness in my relationship with Mike. We're not connected. We're each in our own little cubicles, seeing the world through tunnel vision, pursuing our own agendas. When this happens, I see the ramifications throughout the family. Even my kids react. They're out of sync as well. They're grumpier, don't do their chores, and don't follow through.

~

"About that time, Mike will start to send little signals to me that seem to say, 'You don't have time for me,' and I know it's true. I realize I'm acting like I don't have time for him. I have to rethink my focus: Am I more committed to my schedule than to my husband?"

~

Darla went on to add: "With two busy schedules, we have to work a bit to keep sex a priority. But once we do, it usually filters down through the ranks. When our relationship is cohesive, when we have communication between us, when the quiet, unspoken stuff between us is in harmony, everything's better in the household. For everyone."

~

A happy love life creates a healthy model for our children to follow as they become adults. Why do we so often assume that our children don't know what's going on in our homes? They do, you know. They see and hear far more than we think they do. And even if they don't fully understand what they are seeing and hearing, the words and images stay with them and help shape their perspectives as adults.

~

I remember, for example, seeing subtle signs of sexuality between my parents. Sitting at the kitchen table watching my mom fix him a sandwich, my dad would suddenly pull her into his lap for a kiss. At other times, when she thought we kids weren't looking, my mom would flash my dad a subtle wink. Many were the Sunday afternoons my sisters and I would knock on the locked door of my parent's bedroom and whine, "You've been in there for an hour! We're bored! When are you coming out? To which my mom always replied languidly, "We're resting. Go play and we'll be out soon."

~

Now that I'm a wife and mother, it doesn't take a lot of brainpower to figure out the reasons behind those long Sunday siestas. But at the time, I was clueless. All I knew was that my folks seemed to have some secret between them … a pleasant secret that made them happy. Those images, even without being fully understood at the time develop a positive perspective of sex and sexuality as something wonderful to be cherished and enjoyed by husbands and wives.

~

Adapted by permission from Pillow Talk, by Karen Scalf Linamen, Fleming H. Revell. You can order this resource in our online store or by calling 1-800-FL-TODAY (358-6329).

Pillars In Our Father's House

This is Jeff and CJ. She strives to please Daddy and he knows it. She definately makes him proud.

Pillars In Our Father's House

~

BIBLICAL YOUNG WOMANHOOD
Pillars in Our Father's House
by Valerie Joy Silliman
July 1999
~
Many of us, the older daughters of the conservative homeschool movement,
have arrived at a crossroads. As we enter young womanhood we are thinking
about what we are going to do with our lives. We must choose between the
well-trod, broad, easy path, or the less-walked, narrow road that we know
pleases God. We must search the Scriptures and ask the Lord to show us
His way.
~

We commonly hear: "When you graduate from high school you need to strike
out alone and become your own woman." So you turned eighteen... In God's
eyes, does that mean that you are no longer supposed to stay with your
family under your parents' protection, like you did when you were
seventeen? The Scripture reveals that God placed people into families,
for it was not good for us to be alone. ("It was not good for Adam to be
alone." Gen. 2:18) Why do we feel we should become an independent
individual?
~

When a woman gets married, her identity transfers from her father's
family to her husband's family. When a father walks down the aisle with
his daughter on her wedding day, he gives her away to her husband. That
is supposed to mean that her father is no longer responsible to provide
for her financially or spiritually. He is not her "covering" anymore.
The daughter then leaves her father and cleaves to her groom. No longer
does she daily support her father, submit to him, and work to please him,
bless him and honor him, like she had before. Though he is still very
dear to her, she will leave her father and transfer this devotion to her
husband.
~

Today, fathers walking their daughters down the aisle may simply be
following tradition, unaware of the true meaning in the action. In
reality, a father has usually given his daughter up years before, when
she went away to school, to a job outside the home, or to a mission
field. Instead of continuing to be a vital member and participant in her
family, she became an individual, or "her own woman," with her own life.

Many women getting married today aren't leaving their father's family.
They left them years before. Instead, they are trying to leave their
independence behind and cleave and submit to their newly wed husbands,
but sadly many of those independent ways and attitudes carry over into
marriage.
~

The church has been slowly saturated with feminist beliefs. It isn't
just the world that we have to stand up against anymore. Strong
opposition comes from church friends when a young woman decides to stay
at home. Many Christians understand it is right for mothers to be
keepers at home, but single young women? Accusations are common. "Are
you going to waste your youth doing dishes and laundry?" "Your family
already has a mother. They don't need you to take care of them!" "Single
women are supposed to serve the Lord. Aren't you going to do something
for God during your youth?" "What if you never get married? Are you just
going to stay at home for the rest of your life?" "Are you afraid to
find your own way in the world?" "Tied to your mother's apron strings,
eh?" Though these comments aren't always said in such a blunt manner,
the little disapproving statements, shakes of the head, and the
disappointed looks clearly communicate the message.
~

Sadly, many Christian girls do seek out an independent life apart from
their families. At age 18, it is just assumed that this is the way it
is, the way it should be and the way it always will be. They never even
question if this is the way God wants it to be. Edith Schaeffer, in her
book _What is a Family_, wrote: "Confusion exists among many girls today
because of some of the things put forth by the women's liberation
movement. There are girls today who fear that they are giving in to a
weakness if they show longing or interest in being mothers and
homemakers."
~

Karl Marx, in _The Communist Manifesto_, said, "Do away with the status
of women as mere instruments of production." Women (young women
included!), according to communism, feminism, and worldly wisdom, should
exert their personal identity and strive to be more than mere
homemakers, servants to their families, or "instruments of production,"
as Marx said with scorn. What values and what truth are we basing our
life decisions upon? Let us be that which the communist and the feminist
(and dare I say, the feminist in us?) despise the most, "instruments of
production." We are servants of the King!
~

Girls, are we trying to "Christianize" the feminist movement? Instead of
going to a secular school, we go to a Bible school. Instead of finding a
job in the secular work place, we find a job with a Christian employer,
and call it ministry. We are still leaving our homes and the fathers God
has placed over us as our covering. Notice that the single young women
in the Bible, who were noted for their ministry, were still submitted to
their coverings. The four prophetesses in the New Testament that Paul
talked about were called "Philip's daughters." They gave honor to their
father's name. They were not independent individuals. They were not
under some other ministry, led by another man. They were still at home,
under their father's covering as were Rebekah, Mary, Rachel, and Leah.
Miriam led the Israelite women in worship, and since she did not have a
father, she was submitted to her brothers, Moses and Aaron. So where is
a single woman's place? What is she to do? She can't count on getting
married, so what should she do with her life?
~

Psalms 144:12 says, "...That our daughters might be as pillars,
sculptured in palace style." What a special place for us to fill, to be
such a support to our families that we are like a pillar! How blessed
our families would be to have daughters who are devoted to serving them,
as unto the Lord--daughters who see what needs to be done and do it
quietly without being asked, daughters who daily pray for their family
and pour out their lives, not just physically, but also spiritually. Our
families all need daughters who are content being keepers at home.
Many young women have never even heard of the concept of living with
their parents for the rest of their lives, if they were never to marry.
Once a girl asked me: "I mean, if you were forty, wouldn't you want a
little space of your own? At least a little trailer on your parents'
land?" I love living in my parents' home! I can't imagine ever moving
out for the purpose of declaring my independence or of having my own
space. Mary and Martha did not each get their own apartment; they lived
together with their brother, Lazarus.
~

I know God placed me in my family and I belong at home. This is where He
wants me to minister both spiritually and practically. Even if I never
get married, I would live with my family, and help my parents in their
old age. I would also serve my adult brothers and their wives and
children.
~

As we are faithful at home, the Lord will provide opportunities to serve
the other believers in our lives and the people of our communities.
Christian young women who are committed to prayer and Christ-like
servanthood will make a difference.
~

Corrie ten Boom, as a young woman, prayed for the families on her
street, that they would come to know Jesus as their personal Savior.
Years later, she sat with 19 girls at some sort of camp, and those 19
girls could all trace family members who had been saved, to one of the
families from the same street where Corrie lived as a young woman!
~

There are so many ways in which we can be a blessing. How about writing
notes of encouragement to elderly shut-ins, to someone who is sick, or
to a missionary family? There are a lot of elderly folks and moms who
would appreciate help doing things like ironing or baking. How about
delivering a hot meal complete with dessert? A mom recently shared with
me what a blessing a friend's daughter in her church was to her. She
would just offer, "I'd like to cut out some clothes for your little
girls, to help you get started on your sewing." God will work through
women who are ready to serve.
~

I like to think about Rebekah going about her daily tasks. At a moment's
notice she took on the big job of drawing water for ten thirsty camels.
I doubt it was on just that one occasion, when Rebekah was moved by God
through Eliezer's prayer, that she offered to help. I think she was in
the practice of looking for opportunities to lend a helping hand.
~

Let's ask God to open our eyes to biblical young womanhood. With Jesus'
help let's be the women God created us to be. Let us find our identity,
not in ourselves or in being our own women, but rather in fulfilling our
God-given place in our father's, or husband's, household. Let's start
with what God has given us and be faithful, serving with a song of
praise on our lips and a joyful heart. Let's be willing to let God work
in our lives and sculpt us into beautiful pillars like those in a
palace, daughters of the King!
~

~
Valerie Joy Silliman (age 14½), daughter of Cliff and Jenny Silliman, is
home schooled with her five brothers, and is trying to live out the
things she writes in this article. She publishes _Joyful Heart_
magazine, a quarterly to encourage Christian girls, of all ages, to love
and serve the Lord Jesus Christ with a joyful heart. (Sample is $2.00.
Subscription $8.00--USA, $10.00--Canada/Mexico, and $12.00--other
countries.) She would enjoy questions, comments or responses about this
article from anyone who agrees or disagrees. Write to Valerie at: 46440
~
In His Service,
Stacy

~

This is so true! Our dd also took the SAT because...well, I guess it was
pride...I wanted to be able to tell others that she did very well...as well
or better than many ps children...because I wanted them to see that
homeschooling was better than ps and to prove to them that our efforts were
not in vain. Talk about vanity on my part!! We had become so tired of
hearing (from mostly church people) how she was missing so much by not
being exposed to all of the "educational opportunities" provided in ps. I
really think some of them thought that we were not really/actually doing
school each day because they couldn't even fathom teaching their own
children!
~
If we had it to do again we wouldn't participate at all. I will say that
it really didn't mean anything to our dd one way or the other...she is very
smart, but having her nose in a book all the time just isn't how she is cut
out. She's a people person and loves to be around people.
~
I look back now and realize just how much feminist thoughts and ideas have
permeated the church and even in some very conservative
churches...especially when many older women go to work after the last child
is out...this must look very enticing to the woman who has many small
children at home...you know...get 'em raised and get 'em out!! :o( This is
a thinking that I still have to be very careful of myself...I was brought
up with it to an extent (my mother worked in a bank for most of our lives
at home) and it becomes hard to unmask this thinking because it is so
subtle. And it is one of those subjects that dh and I were never taught
about in our SBC church...now that our dd has graduated she does work but
prefers to live at home under her Dad's authority...not the best we
know...but it is soooo hard to start over when they get in those late teen
years. But, believe me, I do take every opportunity to talk with her about
this and remind her what is God's best. ~smile~ I do feel like that she
will stay at home when/if God brings her a mate as I have seen indications
of this and, of course, am praying that God will melt her heart in this
area.
~
To those of you who are raising your dd's to be keepers at home, please let
me encourage you to stay on this path...the world and even many Christians
will try to turn you around but continue in what you know is God's best.
God's best is often not an easy path, but He blesses in many, many ways if
we just simply obey. An excellent curriculum that helps to raise Godly
keepers at home is "Polished Cornerstones" by Pam Forster published by
Doorposts (they also have one for boys called Plants Grown Up)...even
though we didn't know about this curriculum when we were homeschooling I
did get a copy of it as it is even good for those of us who were not raised
to be keepers at home. :o)

http://www.patriarchspath.org/

Harm in Women Working

Picture from www.allposter.com

Harm in Women Working
~
1. Harm to the Man: When you work, you rob your husband of his right to meet ordinary challenges, and to grow by these challenges. And, as you become capable, efficient, and independent, he feels less needed, andtherefore less masculine. This weakens him. As you lift, he sets the bucket down.
~
2. Harm to the Woman: When you work by choice, you tend to lose some of your womanliness. When you work you tend to take on masculine traits, to be aggressive, bold, capable, efficient, and independent, resulting ina loss of feminine charm. How much charm you lose depends on the type of work. Less masculine jobs are secretarial, clerical, nursing, school teaching, and child care. But any type of work which earns money encourages independence, an enemy to feminine charm. Quoting from my husband's book, "Man of Steel and Velvet": "
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When a woman divides herself between two worlds it's difficult forher to succeed in either. In her world alone she has challenge enough to achieve the domestic excellence she desires. Here she is the understanding wife, the devoted mother and homemaker, and gains great satisfaction from a job well done. This takes great effort. To divide her time and interests between two worlds makes success in eitherdifficult. "Even if she rejects her home sphere and turns her heart and soul to the working world, she will have difficulty. In many jobs she will have a natural disadvantage. She will not meet man's excellence in his world, but will always be secondary to him. So she wanders between two worlds, having rejected her own where she could have been superior and chosen another where she will never be anything but a second-rate man."When a woman works because it is her husband's idea, an even greater harm comes. His suggestion that she work casts doubt in her mind as to his adequacy as a man. If he must lean on her, she will question his ability to solve his problems and face responsibility that is his. This brings insecurity. "Still another harm to consider is the woman's relationship to her employer, especially if he is a man. She's accustomed to looking up to her husband as the director of her activities. When she finds herself taking orders from another man, it is an unnatural situation. She owes him obedience as her employer, and in countless hours of close contactshe may find herself physically attracted to him. Seeing hat his best and perhaps as a more dynamic and effective leader than her husband, she makes comparisons unfavorable to her husband, whose faults and failingsshe knows all to well."
~
3. Harm to the Children: When a mother works due to a compelling emergency, children adjust to this situation. They're able to understand when a genuine emergency exists. They may suffer neglect but don't feel lack of love or concern. When a mother works by choice, great harm can come to the child. When he realizes she prefers to work instead of taking care of him, that she places her interests or luxuries ahead of his basic needs, this raises doubt about her love. The children of working mothers usually suffer considerable neglect. Not in all cases,but in most. The woman who works must dedicate herself to her job in order to succeed and justify her pay. During the working hours her job's a priority. At times it will be demanding. Her children are less demanding. They're naturally the ones who suffer. >>
~
From Fasinating Womanhood

20 Ways to Bless Your Husband

Evenings:

1. Slip to the ladies room and freshen yourself up a bit before your husband returns home from work. This lets him know you care about what he thinks of you appearance.

2. When your husband comes home from a long day of work, meet him at the door with a smile, hug, and a sweet kiss. This lets him know he has been missed.

3. Inquire about his day. This lets him know you are interested in what he does.

4. Let him sit a while and rest from his long day of work. This lets him know you appreciate what he has been doing all day.

5. Save your "Honey Do List" until a time when he is much more rested.

6. Have a healthy and tasty meal ready for at least on cooking.

7. Remember to keep the dishes washed up during dinner preparation to keep there from being so many after dinner.

8. Make sure your home is clean. IMHO, no one likes to come home to a dirty house. If you are a stay at home mom, then there is really no excuse for having a dirty home. I am not saying it has to be spotless, but it should be picked up so your husband doesn’t have to walk over things to get to the couch or recliner.

9. Make sure your home smells nice. If you do not have time to scrub on a daily basis, at least spray some scented Lysol to kill the germs and put a nice smell in the air. My husband loves a good smelling house. He likes to have candles lit for the soothing light and the nice smell or scented Lysol in the air. Normally be the time my husband arrives home, we have already got all the house work done and the smell of cleaning solution is decorating the air. He loves that.

10. Make sure to keep the kids quiet for a bit. They have all day long to run and play outside. Let them be loud then. Prepare the home to be peaceful when your husband returns from work. Remember though, don't keep yelling at the kids to be quiet. Train them to keep noise down and play a bit quieter during the evening.

11. After dinner, clean up promptly. It's nice to have the kitchen cleaned up so the rest of the day is yours.

Night:

12. When it's bath time, run your husband's bathwater or shower. My husband prefers a shower because we have a standup shower, but when your husband is sore and tired, it's nice to be able to relax in a tub with hot water and Epson salt. That’s great for aching muscles.

13. Lay his clothes out for after his bath. This is something our daughter likes to do for her daddy. She will lay out is clothes on the chair and place a sweet note on top of them. I'm sure he enjoys being pampered by not only his wife, but his children as well.

14. Catch him sitting with his feet propped up and massage them while looking in his eyes with a smile on your face. That is, if he doesn’t fall asleep. **SMILE**

15. Do your computer activities some other time. Your husband needs your time after spending all day with his co-workers.

16.Make sure to lay his clothes out each night and make sure everything he needs each morning is together and easily accessible for those mornings when he can hardly open his eyes and find his own things. Actually, it will help your morning routine run more smoothly if you lay everyone’s clothes out the night before.

Morning:

17. Set your clock a bit earlier, get up, prepare a hearty breakfast, then go and wake him (or wait for him to come in from work since my husband works the night shift). That is if the great smell doesn't wake him first. My husband loves to wake up to the smell of turkey bacon, eggs, gravy, and biscuits. When I get up early enough, I have plenty of time to fix his favorite style of eggs. Over easy (without breaking the yoke-YIKES.)

18. When he leaves for work, never forget to tell him you love him. When my husbands leaves, those are the last words I want him to hear from my mouth.

19. Starting your day earlier helps you accomplish more. You can get the cleaning done earlier, get school done earlier, and have plenty of time with the family.
Prepare healthy smacks for you children and husband to easily access. My husband works third shift and never gets up in the afternoon at the same time. So, if I am preparing dinner, he likes to snack on a little something while he waits. Prepare a bowl of bite size carrots, apple slices, bananas, ect.

20. Lastly, my husband loves dessert after dinner. So, each morning I prepare one of his favorite desserts for after dinner. IMHO, nothing smells better than cooking the chocolate filling for a chocolate pie in homemade pie crusts. That’s both of our favorite dessert.

I pray this list helps you to please your husband. Remember, they were not created for us, but us for them.